Gas is Cheap! We're Talkin' Water Here

And it's not just in price, but draining one's cool. If you are going to swill the crystal, you better have it in a bottle you can wash out and use again or you might as well wear fur.

I was reading an article in The Times about bottled water and it occurred to me that one more bit of modern behavior has fallen to the depths of planet-killer. As those of us over 50 used to say, "everything is a hassle."

Here are some raw calculations for you to ponder as you tip your plastic pop bottle (hold the sugar, flavoring, carbonation and chemicals): each year we send a million and a half barrels of oil to the bottle making folks; if most brands of bottled water were made to pump into our cars rather than our stomachs we would pay roughly 6 bucks a gallon, more if we bought it at any of the c-stores that prop up our filling stations; and in San Francisco, Salt Lake City, Minneapolis and New York the mayors are speaking up against the use of the healthy alternative to coffee and vodka. Not that we shouldn't drink water, we just need to think about the packaging.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't there such a thing as recycling all those plastic demons of modern life? Weren't the green bins and blue bags and stuffed parkas and lawn furniture all supposed to usher in a new generation of plastic, fantastic guardians of the earth? The ouroboros arrows signaling peace of mind, firm in the belief that I R OK, U R OK? Don't we recycle anymore?

Seems to me that the people who want to maintain another reason for sucking oil from the ground were hoping that no one noticed the nice, clear, un-recycled plastic that holds the extra virgin glacier water. Could there be a modern day Daniel deciphering the writing on the wall indicated by all those hybrids and all that talk of alternative fuel spewing from Green-D's and those who put bottled water on hip-list in the first place?

Just asking.

Today I stopped into Discount Drug Mart in Hudson for a green, recycled bottle of Diet 7-Up. Wouldn't you know it, there they were, just as plain as day, cans of bottled water! Aluminum cans! Now all they need is a way to reseal the opening and I'm there! Vote for Nader!

Until then, remember we live just south of the greatest body of fresh water in the world. Drink up.